Hi Everyone...
I took the last couple days off work and just tried to gather my thoughts. I feel better but I'm still smoking and probably put on a couple pounds.
NOW it's time for me to get off the freakin pitty pot and move on. I have to think that better things are coming, right?
I'm so glad that you guys have hung in there. Posting here is different then on About.com so I'm wondering if some people are having trouble posting. If so, go to the link on the main page and click on the link that says "View My Complete Profile" and send me an email and I can help you.
Now I have to pick a new quit date. I'm not sure of the date yet but I cannot continue smoking.
We all have our difficult times. Divorce, unhappy at work etc. They are all difficult and I'm the only one that completely lost my quit. I'm not going to be hard on myself but I just need to get a grip and get back on the wagon.
Thank you all for you comments and sharing. We can do this and I will keep up on the blog.
NOW it's time for me to get off the freakin pitty pot and move on. I have to think that better things are coming, right?
I'm so glad that you guys have hung in there. Posting here is different then on About.com so I'm wondering if some people are having trouble posting. If so, go to the link on the main page and click on the link that says "View My Complete Profile" and send me an email and I can help you.
Now I have to pick a new quit date. I'm not sure of the date yet but I cannot continue smoking.
We all have our difficult times. Divorce, unhappy at work etc. They are all difficult and I'm the only one that completely lost my quit. I'm not going to be hard on myself but I just need to get a grip and get back on the wagon.
Thank you all for you comments and sharing. We can do this and I will keep up on the blog.
posted by Tammy at 5:48 AM
8 Comments:
Hi Tammy!
So good to see you writing. Listen, you know you need to quit smoking there's no "should" about it, so I don't think you are there yet mentally. When your head feels less foggy and muddled with LIFE, you will pick a quit date and you will quit. When that time comes, you will succeed and the quit will last. Do I sound like a psychic? I just know that you truly want it, you just have garbage right now to deal with and its not the best time. As for hanging with you, its been a pleasure getting to know you and become your cyber friend. I just wish there were a magic wand I could pass through the screen to you to make it all better for you! We are here if you need us, and when you are ready, you will keep your quit. I've got almost 3 months in and let me tell you, its freedom I haven't felt in years. I carried those sickoretts around with me everywhere! They were like an extension of my arm or something, but I lost that extra appendage and the light feeling is wonderful; not to mention the fact that I can breathe much more easily these days! You will do it, just be kind to yourself.
Yes, posting here was a little bit confusing at first. If you're out there lurking, and haven't figured out how to rejoin the conversation, take Tammy up on her offer for help.
I've picked up a few pounds since I quit, and it's got me working on dieting for only the second time in my life. When I quit smoking, I used all of my concentration, resolve and will power on kicking the nicotine habit. I consciously allowed myself to do anything in place of smoking, and that included eating whatever I wanted and whenever I felt the need. So - no big surprise that I've gained the weight.
Having now kicked the nicotine habit (but still watching out for the junky, of course), I'm going to switch gears and draw on that resolve and will power to focus on losing the weight.
Jeez ... you know, it really just hit me. If I can quit smoking, I can do just about anything I set my mind to, including losing that weight! And hey, that attitude adjustment will come in mighty handy at my job, too!
That was a nice little 'ah HA!' moment for me right there. Epiphanies can be fun!
Good thing it's Spring here in the northern hemisphere. I need to get out of the house, and start doing things.
Just to be clear here, I had weight to lose before I gained about 10 pounds since quitting the cigarettes on 12/31/05.
So add that 10 to the extra 20 I've gained and been carrying around for the past 10 years and calling my 'beer belly', and I could stand to lose 30 to be at my fighting weight.
I'm not crazy however. I'd like to see a gradual weight loss of 1-2 pounds a week, with a goal of losing 20 when I'm done. I'd be very happy with that.
Hmmmmm ... quit smoking AND lose 20 pounds!?! What a success story that would be!
Oh, and I see you've fixed the timestamp problem, Tammy!
thanks!
Ooohh, I'm so toed off! I wrote a screed early this morning, and I must've hit a wrong key, and I lost the lot - so I'm sulkily posting now before I go nigh-nighs. Day 18 today, the numbers are starting to build up again.
I had a miscarriage yesterday, so I know it sounds awful, but it was kind of a relief, that I can put that issue to rest as well, and that i didn't have to make a decision I really didn't want to make.
Obviously,my mood swings wildly from one point to another at the moment, I have so many chemicals and hormones roaming in space. But its been OK, I'm getting there. Meg is still out on planet X and sometimes I feel like i can't reach her, but there we go.
I'm finding the help available now is no better than what it was 13 years ago when Daniel was diagnosed, God you get sick of talking to idiots and incompetents, who actually have NO idea what its like to raise kids with problems. Grrr.........
Fred, I'm sure you will have no problem shifting extra weight - i've actually LOST weight since i quit, but stress is a marvellous weight loss tool. I have had years when I was a tubby wee thing, and I found the easiest thing was just to get moving. I hate having to restrict my food intake or measure and weigh and count calories, so I'd rather run double distance or spend double time in the gym - move it, lose it! Great stress absorber too!
And I agree with Darlene, Tammy - just you be nice to yourself at the moment, and when you're feeling a little more whole, then you can decide what you wish to do. Hang loose Mother Goose!
have a good day all.
Jo,
I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarraige. I know it's bitter sweet for you but it still must be tough. My thoughts are with you.
You are sooooo strong. Keep up great work.
Thanks Tammy for your comment. Yes, in another time and place -like 5-6 years ago, and presuming that there was no chance of autism rearing its ugly little face, i would have been delighted to have had more kids. But reality must win out, and i am 43, soon to turn 44 and we already may have more than enough on our plate.
On good days I am very hopeful that Meg's deficits will be less than Daniel's, and he has turned out to be a fine young man, with a bright intelligence and a wonderfully individual personality. He has THE dryest sense of humour, which is pretty good for an autistic person.
On a down day, i am worried that Meg has NIL speech whatsoever - Daniel developed words at 18 months and then they went away, and his speech came back at approx 3 years and a bit. But little Megs has said nothing to date. It really is a waiting game.
But this is what makes the blog and people interesting - everyone has a story to tell don't they? And nearly everyone has done it tough at some stage or other. I'm really knocked out by how much the average person has inside them. Well, I hope things are travelling OK for you Tammy - its so corny, but time is the only healer really, the rest is just getting through it the best you can. I hope your children are coping OK with it as well. Thoughts are with you too Tammy.
Have a good day all - Day 59/19 today
Hey, everyone. I am doing ok and feeling strong. Day 84 for me and alot of us. 6 more days until 3 months. I think that is phenomonal. It is really a record for me.
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